The Death of the Nice Guy

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=1536229813255619
Courtesy of Epic Videos

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to find the above video on Youtube, so I included a link to the video on Facebook, which you all may or may not be able to view. So, allow me to offer you a brief synopsis:

A female Applebee’s employee with an attractive physical form (her face is blocked by a black bar) is outside her place of employment handing out coupons for a drink special they are having. A guy, modestly dressed, definitely a bit geeky, approaches her. He appears to be nice, intelligent (mentions a fact about the heat that he read in the days paper), and respectful. He compliments her and asks her if he can have her phone number. The next thing you hear is the resounding thud as he is shot out of the sky after several attempts, even offering just to take her out as friends.

So, up comes another guy, nowhere near as smartly dressed, and starts off the conversation with

“Yo, what’s good ma?”

From there he’s skinning and grinning, complimenting her “Does the free drink come with you? You teasing me ma! You look good. You look as good as a drumstick.”

So, he proceeds to entice her up the street to a secluded spot, where they exchange a few kisses, and finally end with a handjob, where he nearly entices her to lick the tip.

A HANDJOB?!?!?!?!

LICK THE TIP?!?!?!?!?

So, after busting in her hand, the guy takes off his sunglasses and do rag, revealing he’s the geeky guy from earlier. He then tells her she’s been exposed as a shallow, crazy chick who wouldn’t give her number to a nice guy, but will beat off a thug.

Now, I have no idea if the video is authentic or staged.  Nor do I know it’s origin, but I do know it’s real, because I’ve fucking lived it.

I like to think of myself s a pretty nice guy. I have my faults, dear lord do I have faults. But I always try my best to treat those around me with respect, especially women. And no, I’m not always successful, but it’s something I strive for.

And in the past, I have been accused by women I was getting acquainted with that I was “too nice.”

Well excuse me for not asking you to beat me off between the salad and the main course.

I’ve also seen guys, some of them uncouth, some of them downright dirtbags  approach the exact same women, with astounding success.

I’ve even done. I’ve put a couple of drinks in, and set out to just be that dude that I pretty much hate, and before you know it, the women are begging to go home with you.

Really?!?!?!?!

Hmm… after a while, you have to start to believe the trend, and perhaps offer a moment of silence to the nice guy.

Courtesy of: bottledupthoughtsandfeelings.blogspot.com

Courtesy of: bottledupthoughtsandfeelings.blogspot.com

Courtesy of: smartshoes.blogspot.com

Courtesy of: smartshoes.blogspot.com

We may not be the most fashion forward individuals. We may not even be dripping with sex appeal and machismo… but hot damn it, we’ve got charisma, and we’re nice… and nice ain’t half bad.

  • We won’t cheat on you.
  • We won’t hit on your friends behind your back.
  • We will treat you with dignity, honor, and respect, and as an equal, and not a possession or commodity.

I simply think about the women I KNOW and the tales of douchebaggery I’VE HEARD, and it boggles my mind.

And I’m the single one.

Well, that is probably for the best, because tomfoolery and I shall not be bedmates…

SHALL NOT BE BEDMATES!!!

So guys, have you noticed this trend as well?

Ladies, have you found yourself passing up on “nice guys” to date a “bad boy”, or a nice “fixer-upper” of a guy?

“Anyone ever call you “The Family Jules?”

So you may recall me mentioning Jules in a previously post.  She was the slightly quiet, reserved young lady that I went out to coffee with, but whose company I really enjoyed.  Well, last week we did a date #2.

I was planning to go and view an outdoor movie downtown.  It was actually a video of Muddy Waters and The Rolling Stones performing together at a blues club here in Chicago in 1981.  Actually, Muddy Waters was performing, and the Rolling Stones, to whom he was a huge influence, came in.  Before you know it, the Rolling Stones was up on stage as the back up band, and Keith Richards was accompanying Muddy on vocals.  Amazing right??

So, I invited Jules, and she accepted.  I thought it would be a good chance to talk and chat, but have something going on around us in case of moments of awkward silence, which kind of hit us a bit on our first date.  Well, I’m not sure how awkward they were…Jules strikes me as the kind of person who is totally ok with moments of silence between people…but then again, she could be thinking “Why doesn’t he say something”.  Hard to tell.

So, we met up outside of the Chicago Cultural Center.  We planned to grab some dinner and take it over to the movie with us.  In the course of conversating, we agreed to grab Chipotle, and then bounce over to Mariano’s for snacks and wine.

Well, the movie was fabulous. The interaction between Jules and I was great as well.  She’s definitely hard to read…mousy in a way, but she’s very sweet.  I enjoy hearing her views on things,and her stories.  She spent a few years in Africa teaching for the Peace Corps. She, much like myself, has an adventurous spirit.  I really like that.  That’s a necessity for me in anyone I plan on dating.

After the movie, I walked her back to her train, and we chatted and laughed.  Once we got to the station, I said “Well, I had a great time, and I’d really like to see you again.”  She agreed, and we hugged.  I was totally going to leave it at that.  I didn’t want to push anything, but as we separated, she definitely moved into position for a kiss…and we kissed.  So, second date, 1st kiss, and it was very pleasant.

And so, we’re having a 3rd date tonight.  Since I planned the last date, this one is up to her, and she was still thinking it over as of last night.  We’ll see what happens.

2 dates…2 outcomes

Hey everyone!

Seems like it’s been so long since I’ve blogged here.  I swear I’m not a total slacker…I’ve just been keeping on the move.  I suppose I’m prepping for the summer.  I tend to always be on the run in the summer.  I’m definitely one of those people who needs a vacation from their vacation.  I’m trying to learn to slow down a bit.  It’s a process.

So, last week, I had 2 dates.

The first one was with a beautiful woman who we will call J.  J was tall, and beautiful.  Much like me she worked in education, which was excellent. I think someone who works in education as well can understand what I go through from day to day at work, and can also offer a healthy perspective to keep me from getting too stressed out about things.

So we were supposed to meet and go to one of my favorite cafes.  However, I ended up training before we were to meet.  I was super hungry and remembered seeing in her profile that she loved Mexican food…so I suggested we get dinner at a Mexican restaurant that I love.

Dinner was great.  Conversation was easy, and we laughed lots.  In addition, I was very attracted to J.  Beautiful smile, extremely intelligent, a musician, she enjoys working out and we seemed to have similar views on a myriad of other topics.  I felt a really good vibe between us.  As we parted….

….ok, so I never know what to do about the end of the first date.  Do you go for the kiss?  How do you know if you should?  I’m horrible at reading the signs, or vibes. That is so not my thing, so I went in for a hug.  The hug lingered longer than a hug normally does.

It was nice…warm…I love hugging.  As we stood there, I squeezed a bit, and felt her body press into mine.  It’d been a while, and I so enjoy that feeling.  We pulled away, and both smiled, I told her I had a wonderful time, and she would hear from me again soon.

It was only 2 days later that I received the following message:

I also had a nice time the other night. I have to tell you I’m having a weird situation where you remind me so much of an ex that, while I know you’re your own person & it’s unfair to put that on you, it’s really about what it’s making me feel & what it’s bringing up in my mind & heart.

I hope you understand that I think you’re funny & sweet but I think the connection is not set up for success or a fair shake. Does that make sense? Some real life crap getting in the way of fun…
Please do take care,
J

Now normally, rejection doesn’t bother me at all.  I’m a firm believer that I may be simply too cool for many women to handle (see what I did there?)..such is life.  However, I was bummed out when I read that message.  I was really looking forward to seeing her again, and getting to know her better.

And so, a few days later, another date was arranged.  This one was with Jules.   We’d exchanged a few emails, and after she had initially cancelled our first meeting, we planned to get together for coffee. Starbucks.  Simple.

And so we met.  Upon initial impression, she was pretty.  Looked a bit different from her picture on OKcupid, but not in a bad way.  In conversation, she later commented that it was a slightly older pic and that she should update it.  So, we walked and chatted.

Now, this date was different from the one with J.  Jules seems much more reserved…quiet perhaps.  She definitely had a much more “suburban” sensibility about her.  Anyone who knows me knows that I can be a bit loud at times, and very animated, and I laugh..lots.  Jules doesn’t seem to have that kind of personality, which worried me as the conversation proceeded.  I know that my personality can be a bit “much” if you’re not prepared for it.

I am the king of TMI!

there were also moments where there was silence.  Usually on a first date, this is considered a bad thing.  I found myself making very general comments to move the conversation along.  I had the feeling I weirded her out with my outgoing personality.  However, as we talked, I found that we had a lot in common. She also had a very cute sense of humor.

She totally made me laugh my face off when she said, “So, is Brazilian Jiu Jitsu like that martial art where they fight with the sticks?”   I’ve heard people ask if it’s like karate, or tae kwon do, or wrestling, but stick fighting?  That was a new one, and she took the mild ribbing I offered her in good spirit, and it turned out she was referring to Capoeira, which at high levels will use sticks.  While I feared that we might be incompatible due to our differences in “energy” if you will…I did think she was very nice company, and she actually did lift my spirits, which were a little low during the day.

I had planned to attend training that evening, so she actually walked me over to the academy.  When we got there, I was pretty sure I’d give her a hug, thank her for the company, and emailing her the next day with no hopes of there being a date #2…and then she said

“So, I’d really like to see you again.”

I actually responded with “Yeah?”

to which she smiled, giggled, and said “Yeah!”

I told her that I would like that, and I gave her a hug, and we parted ways.

I look forward to a second date.  Perhaps someone not like me is what I need.  Perhaps not.  It’ll be nice to explore with someone who is different from me, but not so different that they think I’m a freak…or vice versa.

Well time will tell.  However, it was a nice change of pace, and I suppose we shall see where the future leads.

Quote of the Year!

Well fellow daters, and innocent bystanders who just like to see how others wallow down in the murky depths of internet dating, I have secured the e-dating quote of the year.

A friend texted me asking if I’d ever tried Eharmony or OKCupid, to which I replied yes, I recently started using OKCupid.

She then replied the best thing I’ve heard in quite a while, and definitely a front-runner for dating Quote of the Year:

“On Eharmony I was just matched with my father’s mistress’ son.” 

What?!?!?!   I simply replied “Hot!” and that she should go for it!  (What can I say, I’m slightly evil.)

to which she replied,

“He might be my half brother!”  

And on this hot, sunny Monday, all is right with the world.  🙂

….The Saga continues….

…so, let me start by saying that I had a date last week.  I believe it was last Wednesday.  I can’t quite remember the same day.

Also let me say that that is all I really care to say about that.  She was pleasant.  Definitely not my type.  Just seemed kind of…pessimistic.  I also was not the least bit attracted to her.

I did however, totally turn her on to Jamba Juice, which she’d never had before.  She has since texted me to let me know that she’s had it again.

Rock on!  At least someone is being brought together through my endeavors.

So, I have recently started a profile on OkCupid.  I must admit that I like it more than Match.com.  I’m not sure if it’s going to be more “productive” in my social life, but time will tell.

I have however, ventured into other avenues in hopes of meeting people, and such.  A friend mentioned to me that she used a site called meetup.com, which is not a dating site, but rather a site to be out and about with like-minded people, which I often try to do.

So, I went on my first meetup.com outing this past weekend, and it was fabulous.  I went on an Art Walk in Grant Park, which is one of my favorite parts of the city.

highres_235397902highres_235398032highres_235456162

I literally saw things that I didn’t know existed, although I spend tons of time in that area.  Sometimes, we literally need someone to say “Hey! Stop!  Look at this!”  to realize the beauty that is around us, in architecture, art, sculpture, or just natural surroundings.

In the midst of this excursion, I met a really cute young lady.  I didn’t ask her age, but I sensed that she was younger than me…perhaps mid 20’s.  She was Chinese and worked for a company doing educational research, which I found very interesting considering my chosen profession.  We spent the entire walk chatting, and talking over the art we saw.  Afterwards we went with a group to get lunch, and she had to depart early, but I gave her my number, and she said she would call me.

I kind of really hope she calls.

I’m looking forward to the next walk, which will be in another very historic part of the city.  I’m so excited!  I love Chicago history.

Aside from that, life goes on.  I sometimes feel like I’m on a train headed to nowhere in particular…and usually I love the ride, but some moments I just want to stop and get off.

I’ve also been talking credit with my class, and we did some searches for houses.  I saw a place in River City that would cost less than $900 monthly.  Up until this moment, I’ve never had a desire to OWN my own residence.

I hope I haven’t been bitten by the “I want to buy a condo bug”.

God help us all.

……….

….and so, Jocelyn and I have decided to just be friends.  MMM Hmmm….

…in other news, on Sunday, I had a very unexpected kiss with a very pretty young lady, and I really liked it.  Unfortunately, WhenStrangersKiss, she wasn’t a stranger!

….I also met a very cute woman later the same day.  She struck up a conversation with me while I was sitting on a park bench eating lunch.  More accurately, she started apologizing for her big fluffy dog trying to get at my sandwich, but a conversation ensued.  Turns out we’re both Army veterans, and she relocated to Chicago a few years ago.  I enjoyed our conversation, and when she took her sunglasses off and I saw her eyes, I was totally like “Interesting!” However, I totally choked in the clinch.  I always think “Hey, let me give you my number” or “May I have your number” always sounds so cheesy and cliche, and intrusive in an odd way…I’m strange, but she made mention of Facebook, so I gave her my name, and told her to hit me up.  It does happen to be my primary mode of communication with large swaths of my circle of friends and acquaintances…it’s efficient.  Afterwards I felt like a dillweed and totally said “Man, I should’ve gave her my number!”  Lesson learned.  Well played nerves…well played indeed.

Uh-huh

Just as a quick update, I texted Jocelyn yesterday, asking how her day was going…I knew she had a busy day, but we were supposed to get together later in the evening.
She replied she was doing well, and then she dropped it on me…

“We need to talk.”

Hmm…

#3!

So, I reached a bit of a milestone recently…my first 3rd date from a connection on Match.  It was with the young lady Lauren, whom I’ve spoken about on 2 previous occasions, obviously.  I had a little trepidation about this one because Lauren has seemed a bit…ambivalent, about our dates…at least in person.  Her texts always seem much more encouraging and reassuring, which worries me.  I don’t want to date my phone!  However, thus far we’d enjoyed each other’s company and had great conversations, and lots of laughs, so when she mentioned wanting to have dinner, I was game.

So, as is pretty customary with me as of late, it took us a while to nail down a time.  I’ve been failing to enter things into my planner as of late, and things seem to be popping out of nowhere on the daily, but we finally nailed down a time, as she’d said her first available day during her last really hellish week for a while at work would be Sunday.

I let her pick the place, and she picked this awesome little Irish pub in her neighborhood named {INSERT NAME HERE}.  I took the train and got there a few minute s after she did.

The place was nice, and the food was super yummy.  We had another great date with good conversation, and I thought we connected well.  Pretty standard really…until we decided to get dessert.

There as a cute little ice cream place a few doors down, and we went in.  They had some excellent flavors, and tons of charm (a “Harlem Shake” was on the menu).  So, we got some ice cream, and sat down.  we were chatting and laughing for a while when a large group of people walked in.  They were obviously a little inebriated, and in good spirits.  Then, one of them recognized Lauren.  He walked over.  He was a rider from the bike group she’s a member of.  He was very pleasant, young black man, and very gay (gay as in the modern colloquialism, not just happy).  He had nothing but good things to say about Lauren, and then he sauntered off.

And then…another member of the group recognized Lauren.  “Lauren Bitch!”  I’m pretty sure was what I heard, and over came the young fellow.  So, in the span of 30 seconds, I was fondled, massaged, kissed on the cheek, and told to call this young man (“call me…Lauren has my number!”), while being told how fabulous Lauren is.  He then shifted gears a bit asking Lauren where she met me, while fondling my bicep.

It was like a whirlwind come in and out.  All the while, Lauren was laughing and mouthing “I’m sorry.”  She then told me she knew that was going to happen if this young fellow spotted her.  She went on to say that I earned major points for my reaction.  It turns out that Lauren has quite a few gay friends, as well as a gay roommate, and she was worried as to how I would react to that.  If I didn’t freak out to the kiss on the cheek and massaging, I was game for whatever else was to come.

So, I walked her home, and we had our first kiss.  It was pleasant.  She then offered to cook me dinner on the following Wednesday.  So…date #4 is coming.

*******UPDATE********

Date #4 has actually come and passed.  I will update about it ASAP.  I apologize for sucking this past week.  It’s been a busy one, and my energy levels have been low.  Hmm….

Mixtape Love

So, how many of you at some point in your love life made a mixtape for a significant other?

Remember those days? That was awesome.  For those of you with bad memories, or who lived much of your life living under a rock, or you still smell of Similac, here is the offiicial definition of a mixtape that we will use to move forward in this discussion:

mixtape or mixed-tape is the generic name given to any compliation of songs recorded onto any audio format.

A mixtape, which usually reflects the musical tastes of its compiler, can range from a casually selected list of favorite songs, to a conceptual mix of songs linked by a theme or mood, to a highly personal statement tailored to the tape’s intended recipient. Essayist Geoffrey O’Brien has called the personal mix tape “the most widely practiced American art form”, and many mix tape enthusiasts believe that by carefully selecting and ordering the tracks in a mix, an artistic statement can be created that is greater than the sum of its individual songs.
Source: Wikipedia: Mix Tape

Once upon a time, if you really liked a girl (I’m going to assume that women also dived into the mixtape medium), you would make her a mixtape.  Basically, it could be a mix of songs that made you think of her, or perhaps songs that you hoped made her think of you (insert Ludacris’ “Sex Room” here please).  In any case, as explained above, the mixtape was more than just a gathering of songs, it was a romantic statement (not always romantic, but it sure was a great addition to flowers and/or candy on Valentine’s Day…and don’t even get me started on the advent of Garageband and similar music recording software where you could use the software to put your own commentary or voice on the mixtape as well), that transcended the simple individual songs, and that could serve as a wonderful memory.

So, why am I talking about mixtapes?  Good question.  Well, about 2 weeks ago, an old friend of mine, an ex-girlfriend, shot me the following message:

“I am using Spotify now.  WHERE’S MY MIXTAPE?????”

to which I replied,

“Want me to make you a mixtape?  What’s the theme?

“You missing me.”

I thought it was a cute theme.  Now this young lady in question, we’ve remained in decent contact over the years.  I haven’t seen her in the closer part of a decade, but we will talk periodically, and bring each other up to speed on the ins and outs of life.  So, that was a pretty easy theme to follow, because she is definitely quite the memorable young lady.

While rather rare for most of my friends (I attribute this to weed smoking in my college days), I can still remember exactly where and how I met this y0ung lady.

Now, you have to picture this young lady in your mind. Very athletic build.  Long blond hair.  Deep blue eyes.  Very beautiful face, and an amazing figure.  I remember she was wearing all black.  I noticed her as she was lightly rebuffing this guy in a club, or that’s at least how it appeared.  I don’t quite recall if I had wandered to where she was, or if she’d wandered to where I was, but I just realized I was standing about 5 feet away from a very beautiful woman.

I also distinctly remember that she didn’t smile….at all…for no reason.  When I asked her to dance, she simply nodded, and she looked extremely uninterested in just about anything around her.  After dancing (and I’m not much of a dancer, so the uninterested look on her face made it even more painful), I asked her to have a drink with me.

I recall her being rather silent, and giving very sparse answers to just about every bit of idle conversational banter I had to offer…and then I asked her to dinner.  As I recall, this was the first significant reaction I got from her. She looked a little confused, and asked me what I’d said.  I said something along the lines of “Me, you, dinner, maybe candles, maybe a walk after, maybe even ending with a goodnight kiss.”

I remember her saying something along the lines of “You’re the first guy I met in a club to ask me out to dinner.”

Well yeah, I’m weird, this in today’s world is common knowledge.

From there, I’m not sure how a relationship ensued, but it did.

The young lady was amazing.  A perfect combo of intelligent, cute, funny, sexy, aloof, involved, and detached.  I remember once I was doing some work on my computer, and she said “come cuddle with me”, to which I said “Give me a few more minutes.”

Next thing I knew, she called me, and I spun around, to see her in a see through tank top, with her jeans pushed down low to show her matching see through thong, in a very sexy position looking at a picture on my wall.  Needless to say she got my immediate attention.

However, beyond all of that, I really liked her.  I liked the way I felt with her. That’s what relationships and love are all about isn’t it?  How that other person makes you feel, and the desire to reciprocate that sentiment, or feeling, or emotion?

Eventually, the relationship reached it’s end.  I don’t exactly know why, but I can firmly say that I was dumped.  C’est la vie.

But as we discussed this mixtape, we began discussing the past, and I mentioned how she crossed my mind often at times, and how I considered her very important in my evolution.

How?  Well, in all honesty, I was completely enamored of this young lady.  but, I wasn’t ready for the type of commitment I wanted with her.  That’s probably as strange a comment to read as it is to write, but it’s the most honest way I can think to put it.

But isn’t that how life is?  You meet that perfect person…but it isn’t the right time?  Not the right place?  You’re not the right color?  Not the right religion?  Don’t have the right background?

I continued to tell her how that knowledge was a starting off point for me though, for me to become who I wanted to be.

We began to talk a bit about how we’ve both changed, and how we both find ourselves at points that we probably never would have guessed or imagine.

And so, the next day, I set forth to making a mixtape.  A mixtape that could sum up many of the thoughts that went through my head when I thought of this young lady.

  1. You And Me – Lifehouse
  2. Weekend Love – Dwele
  3. Say Yes – Floetry
  4. One Week – Barenaked Ladies
  5. Butterflies – Floetry
  6. Now You’re Gone (More Than I Can Feel) – Floetry
  7. Symphonie – Silbermond
  8. Jigga,  Jigga!  – Scooter
  9. Brennende Liebe Feat. L’ame Immortelle – Oomph
  10. If I was a bird – Floetry
  11. My hands are shaking – Sondre Lerche
  12. Powerful – Skye
  13. Never Dreamed You’d Leave In Summer – Stevie Wonder
  14. Rock With You – Michael Jackson
  15. Sex Room – Ludacris, Trey Songz
  16. A Long Walk – Jill Scott
  17. Brighter Than Sunshine – Aqualung
  18. Beautiful And Strange – Mudvayne
  19. You Don’t Know Me – Michael Buble
  20. She Said (Remix) (Feat. The Pharcyde) – Jay Dee aka J-Dilla

So, why did I think this was blog worthy?  Because I sat and thought about it, and listened to the songs, and it reminded me perfectly of the deep sentimentality that I possess, and that I often try to hide or deny…but that becomes easier to show with each passing day.  That is how I know that I’m at a perfect place for something new, interesting, long term…something real.

While I could only wish and dream that my path crossed again with this particular young lady, her memory and her friendship, reminds me that I’m pretty close to the goal to which her companionship set me upon; to be the guy who is ready when I meet that perfect woman…and yeah, I’m pretty damn awesome!

Also…I know how to have a really good time:

Also, while authoring this post, I came across the following book:

tumblr_m1dgt11fSa1qzdwano1_400

Click on the picture to see a brief synopsis of the book.  It’s on my to-read list!  Nice to know I’m not the only one who thinks mixtapes are significant.

 

Hot Chocolate Strikes Again

So this Saturday was date #2 with Lauren.  You may recall Lauren from the previous post on our first date. After the feeling of ambiguity I felt after our first date, I was intrigued and a little worried I suppose about how well date #2 would go.

However, her texts seemed very enthusiastic, and she basically offered a perfect place for this second date, an indoor conservatory.

First off, let me say that this was my first time at the Garfield Conservatory, and the place is absolutely beautiful inside.  It’s very calming, and you get to see so many gorgeous flowers, and plants.  It was a nice way to wander around, and talk about a myriad of topics, while constantly having some sensory input if things got a little quiet.  However, conversation with Lauren seems to fly pretty easily.  She definitely has a bit of a silly disposition much like myself, and is quick to crack a joke or laugh at herself.  For those of you who don’t know me, I laugh at myself a lot.

So we wandered through the conservatory and took in all the sights, and sounds.  You can hear the insects rustling around in the dirt.  Crickets, etc.  I felt like a little kid, wandering around, touching every plant that had a sign that said “Don’t Touch!”  What can I say?

So, we were in the conservatory for about an hour.  So, as the conservatory was closing, I asked her if she had time for coffee.  I use coffee as a colloquialism, because I DO NOT drink coffee.  At least, not straight black coffee…or with cream or sugar…well, it has to have a lot of cream…and a lot of sugar.  Ok, it has to be more like a latte-esque drink.  Preferably if it tastes like coffee, it has to have equal amounts of chocolate and….

…ok…I think you get the point. But so, we decided to head back to my neighborhood since we were closer to there than her neck of the woods (and she was so kind to drive).  After some deliberation, we decided to check out Alliance Bakery, which I visit way more often than I care to admit to.  However, I love their cherry hot chocolate.  So there we were, checking out the sweets.  I decided to stick with my hot chocolate.  Lauren decided to go with a cake pop.

So we sat, and talked, joked around, and laughed…a lot.  Which was nice, and refreshing.  Lauren made me taste her cake pop, which I’d never had before.  It was a very sweet gesture.

One of my thoughts as I went in to this date was as to the fact of whether I’m attracted to Lauren.  At this juncture, I don’t know how to accurately answer that question.  I did however notice that when I’m there with her, my focus is squarely on her, which I take as a good sign.

So, much to my chagrin, the ending to date 2 felt exactly like the ending of date #1:  very businesslike.  Quick hug, talk to you later, and out!  Just felt…awkward.  So, I thought that maybe that was that.

And then…

…I got a text later that night.  It basically said she’d like to see me again really soon, but has a super busy week ahead…so, let’s do dinner next Sunday.  She mentioned it would be a nice step forward from hot chocolate and desert, which I said to my defense was completely coincidental that second time round.  She said she knew the perfect place for dinner and would shoot me details later this week.

Once again her exuberance over text seems totally unlike her actual in person demeanor, as far as excitement towards my company is concerned.  I know however that I often read body language and the sort to much.  As we continued chatting via text, we got onto the topic of yoga, which I said I haven’t done in forever (since the summer actually). She replied that that would be an excellent activity for date #4 and I should start planning now. Hmm…go figure.

Well, what is certain is that at his point, I have a date #3 planned, which will be a first for all of my match.com endeavors.  I’m looking forward to it.  Good times!